Berlin German College Life Germany Observations sarcasm

Lecture Hall Noise: Concerto Nr. 1 in E Major

Some scattered thoughts on all the things you can hear inside a lecture hall instead for the actual lecture:

Some people type so vigorously on their laptops, you might think their lives depend on it. Maybe in a way they do. Two more weeks until finals.

While the crowd has just now managed to get seated, another group comes in (10 minutes late) like some animals who are finally let out to run in the open. *Sarcasm*

Someone drops their glass bottle of club mate, Berlin’s ultimate hipster drink. We hear it rolling endlessly down to the podium. How have these people remained hydrated before this magic “elixir” has flooded the local stores and the consumers’ hearts all the way from South America? Mate- doping for students and all night party hipsters.

The door slams shut behind them. Anyone ever heard of closing the door after entering when class has already started? Apparently not.

Again the squeaking of wooden chairs and tables. People getting up to let others pass into the rows of seats. I feel someone stretching out his leg next to me and climb across the last row of seats only centimeters away to my right. I’m telling you: it won’t be long until someone chops someone’s head off in the process of that “athletic performance”. *Sarcasm*

Isn’t it interesting how intensively so many people have to cough all of a sudden when you put them together in one room?

The newcomers open their bags, get out their sandwiches and cups of couscous. Let the chewing contest begin! The professor remains unimpressed. You might think he talks into empty space and doesn’t mind, which in a way is quite impressive.

The room fills with the smell of black bread with sunflower seeds, butter and lettuce.

The girl in front of me shakes her gum container. Finally, someone with a sense of rhythm! *Sarcasm*

By now the professor’s words are nothing but a hum of the sea. I might just as well use this time to practice my mindfulness technique, lulled by the soothing sound of my professor’s gentle Bavarian accent (which I do indeed find interesting to listen to, by the way), until the prototype exam questions come on the screen.

A few more reasons for why studying from home was initially not such a bad idea.


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